So remember a few blogs ago I mentioned how this woman on the subway didn't allow another woman to sit....well that same individual actually gave up her seat to me today!
Must be ths holidays lol
Must be ths holidays lol
The Life And Times
When people describe this young man he is often described as a man of few words but with an open heart. His actions generally do the talking and his ability to show his honesty through his body of work has always shined. On the brink of success has been the tidal wave in which he always rode on. Pushing forward without looking back and through it all no one ever saw the dark holes and deprived attention he admittedly felt he should have had.
Ego Trippin
I'm stepping out of my comfort zone right now to just freestyle my thoughts as I begin to wonder if people understand the value of...
How Rye Met Steph
It was first grade when I first met Stephanie. She was the smallest girl in class and I was the smallest boy in class..
Two Years Gone
I mentioned in a few blogs back (RyEBlogs 4.8.10) that I would dispel a couple of things that I have gone through during some of the most private times of my life. They were private because well...I couldn't exactly be open about certain things due to the circumstances. So this will be my first mini series on this blog that I will title Two Years Gone. This is in no particular order during that time period but more thoughts and things I felt during that time..
So You Want To Date A B!
My mom always told me one of the most important decisions I'll ever have to make is who I want to bring into the family and start a family with. As a child I never quite understood that. As I grew up and started dating it became abundantly clear to me. Crystal clear in fact..
Monday, November 30, 2009
RyE On 26
Posted by The Life and Times... on 12:24 AM
I can still get down lol.Thanks to all the people who came and showed your boy love.
"I got nothing but looove for you baby"
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
RyE On The Cure/Pain
Posted by The Life and Times... on 11:47 PM
Hmmmmm....sitting here trying to think of the words to say.
I feel like my head is in a daze. I have a ton of things on my mind but don't know how to get it down so I'm going to freestyle my thoughts.
We turned into me and her. The plural became singular and the relationship changed status. Always positive never negative is my motto so even in dark times I still see the light. Just because you love someone doesn't always mean they end up being your fairy tale ending.
"Ever after" always seemed so far in hindsight but I lived it as close as I could. As I said there was nothing negative but I almost feel like it would be easier that way when separation sets in and the walls around you seem to be your only friend.
It hasn't been too long since it became official but it seemed a long time coming. And that's the sad part. I know...no scratch that...WE know that this is the right thing to do.
And as time waits for no one we set off in our separate directions. We did our own Halloween events, hung with our own friends, and celebrated without each other. It was surreal and throughout the minutes, seconds, hours I couldn't get her out of my mind. At times I felt guilty when I was feeling like I was doing something I shouldn't; only to remind myself that there no longer is a we so whatever I feel is justified then so be it.
flash forward....
I saw her on the way up. I glanced at her like I have a million times over. Nothing new nothing different. Yet all new and all to unfamiliar at the same time. I said hello and she said hi back. She had something to give me and we chatted about this and that for a minute. We laughed and talked like we always did. I said its getting late why don't you get something to eat and I'll walk you to the store. She obliged and said lets go.
Funny how life is full circle. This was how we fell in love to begin with. Late nights led to commonality that sprung out love. And so we walked and everything became familiar. Open doors...she first me second...side by side we walked.
We got to our destination she ordered her food and I was there by her side.
A few moments later I walked her back to her office. It was time to say goodbye and then everything that was familiar vanished and reality set in.
I watched her on her way back. I glanced at her like this is goodbye. That's when I saw her eye glisten in the dark fall night. They were teary eyed. And like a yawn I caught it too. I pulled her in for a hug to avoid seeing her face express her heart break knowing that I am the reason for it. Although I hope she knows I feel the same. I said goodnight and don't stay too late. She said she won't and like always I told her I would call her later. Trying to grasp whatever I could to make it feel like old....
She turned, headed back in and I walked away. Hesitation set in and I turned around to get a second glance. She was gone in the distance. Head down arm motion crossed her face to wipe the sadness away. I reached my hand out as if I could lend a hand to wipe the tears but we were already gone too far.
I gathered myself together and moved on in my direction. Same motion same demeanor as her. The hand I reached out to her I used for myself. Wishing it didn't have to be this way. Our hearts were broken. A million questions raced through my thoughts. How did it get this way? How do I stop the hurt inside? How do I let her know I still care? As I walked it was at that moment I realized that to her I am both the cure and the pain. And the questions turned to one. How do we move on from here?
I feel like my head is in a daze. I have a ton of things on my mind but don't know how to get it down so I'm going to freestyle my thoughts.
We turned into me and her. The plural became singular and the relationship changed status. Always positive never negative is my motto so even in dark times I still see the light. Just because you love someone doesn't always mean they end up being your fairy tale ending.
"Ever after" always seemed so far in hindsight but I lived it as close as I could. As I said there was nothing negative but I almost feel like it would be easier that way when separation sets in and the walls around you seem to be your only friend.
It hasn't been too long since it became official but it seemed a long time coming. And that's the sad part. I know...no scratch that...WE know that this is the right thing to do.
And as time waits for no one we set off in our separate directions. We did our own Halloween events, hung with our own friends, and celebrated without each other. It was surreal and throughout the minutes, seconds, hours I couldn't get her out of my mind. At times I felt guilty when I was feeling like I was doing something I shouldn't; only to remind myself that there no longer is a we so whatever I feel is justified then so be it.
flash forward....
I saw her on the way up. I glanced at her like I have a million times over. Nothing new nothing different. Yet all new and all to unfamiliar at the same time. I said hello and she said hi back. She had something to give me and we chatted about this and that for a minute. We laughed and talked like we always did. I said its getting late why don't you get something to eat and I'll walk you to the store. She obliged and said lets go.
Funny how life is full circle. This was how we fell in love to begin with. Late nights led to commonality that sprung out love. And so we walked and everything became familiar. Open doors...she first me second...side by side we walked.
We got to our destination she ordered her food and I was there by her side.
A few moments later I walked her back to her office. It was time to say goodbye and then everything that was familiar vanished and reality set in.
I watched her on her way back. I glanced at her like this is goodbye. That's when I saw her eye glisten in the dark fall night. They were teary eyed. And like a yawn I caught it too. I pulled her in for a hug to avoid seeing her face express her heart break knowing that I am the reason for it. Although I hope she knows I feel the same. I said goodnight and don't stay too late. She said she won't and like always I told her I would call her later. Trying to grasp whatever I could to make it feel like old....
She turned, headed back in and I walked away. Hesitation set in and I turned around to get a second glance. She was gone in the distance. Head down arm motion crossed her face to wipe the sadness away. I reached my hand out as if I could lend a hand to wipe the tears but we were already gone too far.
I gathered myself together and moved on in my direction. Same motion same demeanor as her. The hand I reached out to her I used for myself. Wishing it didn't have to be this way. Our hearts were broken. A million questions raced through my thoughts. How did it get this way? How do I stop the hurt inside? How do I let her know I still care? As I walked it was at that moment I realized that to her I am both the cure and the pain. And the questions turned to one. How do we move on from here?
Sunday, November 1, 2009
RyE on All Good Things Must Come to an End
Posted by The Life and Times... on 11:20 PM
"Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end"
Just wish it didn't hurt this much....
Going Dark for a bit
Just wish it didn't hurt this much....
Going Dark for a bit
Monday, October 26, 2009
RyE On Happiness/Familia
Posted by The Life and Times... on 10:41 PM
Lately I've been feeling a bit lost. My heads been overloaded with things that I can't seem to focus. I forget conversations I have with people, forget what I'm doing in the MIDDLE of doing it. I feel like I'm losing my damn mind. It's been a long time since I can say that I am truly happy with my life.
I've been saying I'm maintaining instead of excelling. I've been saying I'm satisfied instead of saying fulfilled. And more importantly I've been saying I've seen better days than saying I'm good I'm happy.
There's a number of factors that contribute to this. My job, my current status, my relationship, some of the friendships/people I associate myself with.
I'll briefly break down each one for you:
Getting back to my point above. I feel like right now I only got a handful of people I can just bare my soul so to speak and say whats on my mind. But the rest...the rest is all on me. I feel like I'm Rosa alone in this world with no one to give me a helping hand. Not that I'm looking for one but sometimes its nice to know that someones got my back. I felt this way all morning till I remembered how I felt this past Sat....
I was with my family on Saturday for the baptism of Sophia (the newest baby girl to the family). I found out that there will be not one...not two...but THREE new babies coming our way soon! I couldn't wait to spread the good news. It felt awesome being with my family. After the party we went back to my cousins house where all my tita's and titos and cousins watched their most recent trip to the Philippines this fall to see the opening of the Capilla de San Antonio.....
Part 2 to come (sorry it's late)
I've been saying I'm maintaining instead of excelling. I've been saying I'm satisfied instead of saying fulfilled. And more importantly I've been saying I've seen better days than saying I'm good I'm happy.
There's a number of factors that contribute to this. My job, my current status, my relationship, some of the friendships/people I associate myself with.
I'll briefly break down each one for you:
- My Job - I HATE it. My passion is gone. My patience with everyone and everything we go through has BEEN gone. My problem is that it pays the bills and I'm better than the rest at what I do. So like every catch 22 I'm stuck in a predicament. But I know I'll figure someway out...I always do
- My Current Status - Like I mentioned before I feel like I'm maintaining instead of excelling. I need to start making moves towards a more rewarding life. I am a home owner but barely get to live life because all my money goes to mortgage payments and bills. The American Dream ain't always what it seems. You only live once right so fuck it...lets go on a shopping spree haha
- Problems with the wife...don't discuss em
- I feel like everyone's got their own agenda. Rightfully so they should look out for their own well being especially in a time like this.What pisses me off are the two face bitches that say something to save face only to turn around and deny it when they are called out on it. Then there are those pple who you can't seem to understand but something in your gut just tells you that they have a hidden agenda.
Getting back to my point above. I feel like right now I only got a handful of people I can just bare my soul so to speak and say whats on my mind. But the rest...the rest is all on me. I feel like I'm Rosa alone in this world with no one to give me a helping hand. Not that I'm looking for one but sometimes its nice to know that someones got my back. I felt this way all morning till I remembered how I felt this past Sat....
I was with my family on Saturday for the baptism of Sophia (the newest baby girl to the family). I found out that there will be not one...not two...but THREE new babies coming our way soon! I couldn't wait to spread the good news. It felt awesome being with my family. After the party we went back to my cousins house where all my tita's and titos and cousins watched their most recent trip to the Philippines this fall to see the opening of the Capilla de San Antonio.....
Part 2 to come (sorry it's late)