RyE On Premature Retire and Other random thoughts

I apologize for the premature retire post when I said I was going to take my talents to Tumblr. Honestly I think it has a better set up but for someone who has zero writing skills (thats meee) and who goes through serious dry spells with my blogs I found it to be way too easy to just "reblog" or post a video/photo up.

I couldn't quite get any writing down or off my chest with all those distractions. But like any great talent...you should always be ready for a come back! So let me blow the dust off my finger tips...tap into the good ol noggin and just free flow.

SXSW has just wrapped and reading reviews and asking a friend of mine who attended I was more curious about what he heard that hasn't gone mainstream yet. Anyone who knows me knows that I love music. I'm not going to claim I'm a music head and know all these great "underground unknown talents" or my opinion on music is superior than yours. No, I like all types of music from mainstream to underground and I believe everyone has a right to be passionate about how they feel about the art.

I won't knock people for what they believe in but what I do have issues with are people who claim that an artist who is so pure and has raw talent when they are unsigned and underground no longer have that talent when they cross over to the main stream. How does one lose that talent just because more people are tuning in? Does the "art" suffer because it is now accessible to a wider audience and therefore caters to far less understanding of what talent it? Are you saying that once you cross over you have to sacrifice truth and dumb your talents down so others can relate?

maybe.

I can understand that point of view but what I can't understand is how you turn your back on the artist you have supported while they were "starving." As any fan I'd imagine you would want the best for whoever you are idolizing no matter how far it takes them. And as fans we need to be honest to ourselves as well. Music is personal. I don't care how you slice it. One line, one rip chord, one bridge that carries over and takes you to that next level you can't help but feel intoxicated with it. Or perhaps it's the lyrical combination of words that says "I get you" and "this song is about me." Music has the ability to tug at our hearts and is a form of art that can take you really high or really low.

Perhaps we just feel too personally vested in artists when they are unknown because we feel we knew them before the fame. We were there struggling with them. And after going to all the bars, and local town band battles, open mics, and street parties you realize they are the same as you. You can relate. But the minute they sign...all of a sudden things change. And now the secret talent you always knew is exposed and no longer a secret. The everyday common man/woman you related to is now a superstar and you can't relate.

Whatever the cause, and whatever the reason, don't abandon your fan membership just because they crossed over to the dark side. Because at the end of the day...if it wasn't for people like you...they? Wouldn't have made it. So enjoy the ride!

[Side bar: As a Hip Hop Head...I'm really tired of people saying "{insert rappers name} is REAL hip hop"...What is REAL and what is not REAL is all subjective. Maybe you should look up your history on hip hop and realize that the essence of hip hop was driven out of cultural and rebellion towards the norm. For one to claim so and so is REAL hip hop should know that Hip Hop is DIVERSE. Quit trying to hate on other people's love of their HIP HOP!]

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RyE On What Fuels You?

I admit I like people who walk around with a chip on their shoulder. Right, wrong, or indifferent on what that chip is I appreciate what it brings out of that individual. Most of my life I've been told that very phrase. And most often I would deny it. As I get older and reflect back on the things that fueled me it has become almost obnoxiously clear that I did in fact walk around with a big ass chip.

I can't say I had a bad childhood. I was never denied anything. I never felt that I ever had to struggle for money or food. I lived a really well rounded childhood. Now where this chip came from I don't know. Napoleon complex? Maybe. I was the shortest boy in my class and had to deal with stupid medical issues that made everyone around me baby me and treat me "with care."

As I got older it moved to doubting what  he can accomplish. Always being surrounded by my older cousins I always had someone watching my back. Nothing I ever did was fully mine. All my accomplishments and friendships I made seemed to be driven on the fact I had a family lineage of popularity and success before me.  And lucky me...I must have just gotten some left overs.

Each stage of my life I've felt the need to prove myself in one facet or another. When I first started my career this supposed chip was so big I walked into my first job out of college like I own this place. Almost as if the job was beneath me. I moved up  quickly and moved onto the next phase of my career. And building my reputation and name all over again was a new challenge with new obstacles.

I look back on all these particular times of my life and I sit and reflect on where it has gotten me today. And I can say with a clear and unbiased mind that for everyone who ever doubted me, anyone who ever thought I wasn't good enough, and anyone who ever thought that I was nothing more than a hot shot kid on the come up: I hate you all. I took that ball of hatred and channeled it as fuel to my success. Every stumble and every fall I took I know put smiles on your faces. It only made me want to get up that much quicker and hit you back that much harder.

See when I say I hate you I'm not sugarcoating this like "ooooh I hate you man!" Nah I legit have this evil resentful hatred towards everyone who couldn't see me for the man I am. Judge me? Tell me I don't measure up? Too blinded to see what I have to offer? Doubt that I can ever be a man, who is successful in this world, on his own two feet? To hell with all of you.

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RyE On Goodbyes

Goodbye Blogger - Hello Tumblr

http://ryeblogs.tumblr.com/

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RyE On Thanks

Thank you God:

• For another day
• Keeping my family strong despite the struggles
• The love I get from all my family and friends
• Giving me a wonderful family 
• Friends to lean on
• Tiffany <3
• The doctors and nurses who took care of me this past year
• A career that is successful
• My talent and abilities you have given me
• The strength to persevere 
• My wonderful new 2010 addictions after a 3 year hiatus....(don't judge me)
• For recognizing my weaknesses....and accepting them for what they are
• For BLESSING me and those I love
• ....many more thanks!

They say "to whom God gives...much is expected"

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RyE On So You Want to Date a B! (The Dress)

When this portion of my blog turns into a best seller I doubt this will be in the first chapter. No no..probably later in the book or maybe in the second edition. But while it is still fresh in my head I may as well teach this lesson.

This lesson is entitled the Dress

I never understand the dichotomy of a fashion minded woman. Don't get me wrong. I want my woman fashion forward and to be sexy and sophisticated in how she presents herself. All my women must be strong in order to be with me and therefore looking the part is half the battle. But all the rules and stipulations on what you can and cannot wear...how many times you can wear it....and all that x's and o's is like drawing up a football play. It's a little too complicated.

So let me break down the situation. I was attending a college friend of mines wedding this past weekend and my date was (in my opinion) over analyzing what to wear for the wedding. Me? I just had to get a suit and boom done. The most thinking I would have is what shirt and tie combo to go with it (which I picked out the morning of....um with her help).

But weeks leading up to the wedding my date couldn't find a dress to wear despite having a closet FILLED with beautiful dresses that I am sure would have been just right for the occasion. However, to my knowledge...you women just cannot wear the same dress twice! (sooooo why buy it???)

The week of the wedding was approaching and my date still had not picked out a dress. She was close! She picked a dress then realized...she was going to wear it to work.......(deep sigh). So she goes on this website "rent the runway" (cheap plug) where she starts sending me dresses to approve for the wedding. After several...several....SEVERAL.....dresses we finally settle on a top three. One of the dresses in particular we BOTH fell in love with.

The dresses came in the night prior to the wedding date. All was working out till....I get this

 

At first I was like (draw dropped) she looked gorgeous and radiant in the dress. Then I looked at it again and noticed....that is a LOT whiter than what we saw on the website which described the dress as GOLD. So not wanting to panic I simply thought maybe it was the phone camera she was using that made it look off white. This led to a series of massive texts to ANYONE I knew who would give me their opinion.

The responses came in:

• Off white
• Cream like
• White
• White with a tint of Gold
• "You can't wear that to a wedding unless you're the Bride"

(DEEP DEEP SIGH)

Now as a man you have to know when and where to disclose information to a woman about how they look...how they dress...and what is and is not appropriate when they are looking for you to give them some advice. In this case? Yea I was NOT about to have her panic even more about this dress.

So naturally I tried to keep these responses to myself and reassure her that everything was going to be AAAAA-OK even though deep down inside I was thinking to myself SHIT! FUCK! WHYYYY??!? =)

It is bad enough she knows NO ONE at the wedding except me and the last thing I needed was a date who wore a faux pas wedding dress. Still I figured it was best to just go with the flow and if she wore the dress we will ride out together in it. (even if it did have us getting side eyes and getting kicked out the wedding)

The next morning she came (an hour and a half later but that will be for another story and another lesson). To my surprise she had bought another dress that morning to wear. She tried on all the dresses again and in person she looked even more beautiful than any camera could ever capture. The dress we both fell in love with looked amazing and in truth it was a gold dress but in the wrong lighting could easily be mistaken as an off white color. And sadly we went with another dress. The dress she had bought that morning.

What I learned from this experience is that when you put a woman in a situation where they are going to be in unfamiliar territory and you are the only link they have... it is necessary that they feel comfortable in whatever sense of grounding they can attach themselves to. In this case the dress was that comfort zone. She may not have known anyone going into this wedding, and may not know how fancy of a wedding it was going to be but as long as she felt comfortable with the dress and she knew I was comfortable with her in it than that's all that mattered.

I thought at first all this was over reacting and silly but fella's you have to realize that as much as you may think your date is over reacting to how she looks, it is the one thing she has control over. Giving her grief over what she wears will do you no favors. And when she is asking for your opinion on a dress it is because she wants to look good not only for herself but for YOU. She is trying to impress people for YOU because they matter to YOU. So don't roll your eyes or feel like its a chore when going dress hunting with your woman. At the end of the day shes thinking about you more than she is herself. I'm lucky enough to have brought someone who cared enough for me to do just that. And truth be told....it didn't matter to me what dress she wore because she looked beautiful in every single one. But even if she wore that amazing white/off white/cream like/gold shimmery dress....and the wedding decided to chase us out with pitch forks and burning stakes.....I think it would be all worth it just to see her in that dress for one moment in time.

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RyE On "Must be a Slow Week" (CLB)

"That's Him!" I'm usually what they whisper 'bout
Either what chick he with, or his chip amount...

So don't believe everything your earlobe captures, it's mostly backwards unless it happens to be as accurate as me and everything said in song you happen to see...then, actually, believe half of what you see, none of what you hear, even if it's spat by me!

I've come to realize that Hollywood Pes' is truly going to be a difficult moniker for me to live up to. Back in 2006 that was my nickname. More so how I carried myself but little did I realize that my life would be so under the microscope.

I'm not really anything special. I don't live an outlandish lifestyle. I'm very much a private keep to myself kind of guy. The industry in which I happen to put my career into however...thinks otherwise.

"The streets is talking..." "SO ARE THEY TRUE?" "A little birdie told me..." "Ok...so look me in the eyes and tell me this isn't true...." "OMG So good to see you...hey btw..are you dating..."


I realized that coming back to the place I had left only 5-6 months ago was going to cause some controversy. Add in the fact that I don't talk about my business to the general public and inquiring minds are going to want to know. But the attention that has been given to me in the last three days has been crazy paparazzi status.

Someone actually "caught" me having dinner with a certain individual and felt it was necessary (during my time off mind you) to spread that around. Next thing I know there are rumors of me being with this young woman. Really? I can't have dinner with someone without already being attached to them in some way? And honestly...HOW do you manage to "catch" me having dinner???

The next big topic is why did you come back?? Well it doesn't really matter does it? I'm back and whatever events led me here is just details that doesn't concern you. Then they want to know if I got dropped...(shaking head slowly with eyes closed).....and do you got beef with ____

No and No.

Sometimes there's not always a story behind every action that I do. And if there is one and you don't know about it...that was by design.

I understand I need to open up. I have ways of doing that. I would consider this blog even as an outlet. I talk to certain people in my life that I feel I can talk to about and they will hear me out without trying to talk to me like I'm a child. Point is...I'm working to the best way I know how to....open up.

Yet it's like that old saying...give an inch..take a mile. Your sucking the life out of me like thirsty bloodsuckers (no pun intended). I swear my life isn't worth your time to worry about all the questions that seem to pop in your head. I certainly do not need you to worry about who I am seeing.

Which brings me to this next point. You can read the comments...see the interactions...look at what pictures you can find. You can draw your own conclusions but the reality is....you do not know US. You don't know what we talk about, you don't know how we interact with each other, you don't know what draws us to each other. You simply do not know. So don't try to. Don't analyze us. Don't draw conclusions because WE? Are way too complicated for you to understand.

To my friends who are concerned...I understand your concern. I appreciate the pact that we made you are living up to it. I truly feel blessed you are looking out for my best interests but I am not blind. Nor am I stupid. My actions may seem like I am both. But I know something that no one knows (maybe not even her) and that is my heart.

I am a grown man who makes his own decisions in his life. I do not need to validate your concerns or your over active curiosity. I do not need to change my life because of your assumed conclusions. WE are good. And you can take that how you want it but know that no matter what...you still won't understand because you are not a part of US.

So let me be. I'm drained. Overwhelmed. And almost defeated by all these paparrazooh's who can't seem to see my life as anything but open to be stalked. And why? Because I chose not to disclose my personal life to all of you? Don't try to give me 15 minutes...I don't want even 15 seconds.

Our Crazy Little Bubble is at full capacity...and it's a party of two.

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RyE On Our Crazy Little Bubble "No I in Us"

She: God I hope this dress works in person when you see it!
Rye: Lol I'm sure it'll be fine
She: I think its funny the ONE dress we loved
She: You called "sexy"
She: Is the ONE dress that is causing drama
She: That would be "us"
Rye: Lol
Rye: I was wondering where u were going with this
She: Lol
Rye: I was like is this girl going to somehow blame me for this
She: Lol
She: No blaming us.
She: US
Rye: Lol sure...
Rye: Us

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